Canada enters new age - where will it end up - not all that certain - but the natives are happy. We replaced let then eat cake with let them smoke their brains out.

Rivers 100x100By Ray Rivers

October 18th, 2018



It’s this recurring dream – Rob Ford is back again but this time he’s the PM and his drug of choice is marijuana rather than crack cocaine. Why else would Canada be only the second, arguably the first, nation on earth to fully legalize weed? And it’s no wonder everyone in the country is so happy today. We haven’t seen this kind of euphoria since we won the Second World War. Our national jubilation is so strong that I’m sure Justin would not be opposed if he declared himself PM for life.

Weed line ups in Mtl

Montrealer’s lined up to purchase cannabis.

And if you turned on the TV recently you’d see how the media has freaked out – getting their high-on with non-stop broadcasting of all the ins and outs of this ancient far-out drug. Of course in Ontario you can only get MJ legally by ordering through the provincial on-line agency. Premier Ford, for some unknown reason, has killed the previous plan to conveniently and safely sell the product in LCBO stores. No, rumours to the effect that Doug is going back to his alleged occupation of dealing drugs cannot be substantiated – and besides he’s the premier of all the people now.

Drugs ordered on-line would have to be delivered by Canada Post, which is now almost certainly heading for a very long strike. So you might want to put a hold on stocking up your larder with munchies. And don’t be surprised to see some very happy posties dancing around on the picket line as they roll and light up your mail. And watch out for the stampede as the postal strike mob heads out for an overload of Timmys to feed their brains.

Since it’s now OK to engage in reefer madness the second shoe drops – the question about the fate of all those sorry sods who were unlucky enough to get nailed for simple possession. It was illegal at the time, right. But it’s not now. And there are still questions over what possession really means and when it means dealing.

The NDP says the records should be expunged and the Tories say spare the rod and spoil the children. Nobody should be pardoned, at least not without paying the fee and waiting for some ten years they believe. But hey, wouldn’t this be the perfect time for Mr Trudeau to pull off another of his famous public apologies.

Us border guards

US border guards are fixed on keeping out cannabis out of their country.

You are being warned by US authorities not to cross the border even if you so much as dreamt of ever getting high. The guards are rumoured to have access to the on-line store orders and your criminal records, even if pardoned. But then they do keep changing their story almost every day. Still I’ve learned not to mess, or joke, with those well armed folks. Besides it is above their pay-grade to even consider that recreational weed is legal in nine states and that over 60% of Americans want it legal everywhere.

All the people I know who ever smoked the stuff have decided to give up MJ now that it’s legal. I mean what’s the point – the thrill is gone. Surveys show that less than half of all Canadians are planning to ever buy the stuff. But they’re probably lying. And so are the ones who claim to never having at least tried it. We’ve been conditioned to lying about drugs from that first painful lecture our parents conducted on the birds and buds.

Trudeau - happy

Trudeau is delighted with the way his election promise is being received.

Justin may have broken a few promises in his term as PM, starting with the last election being the last election with a first-past-the-post electoral system. Hey but if you smoke enough dope the plan is that you won’t care – about that or our growing national debt, or the painful memories of that India voyage.

Of Canada’s recent PM’s: Diefenbaker killed the Avro Arrow; Lester gave us the flag; Pierre entrenched our supply management and cultural industries, Brian the gave us the GST and so-called free trade, Jean the long gun registry, Kim, Paul and Stephen almost nothing, but Justin made us happy. I wonder who will be remembered best in the history books.

Rivers hand to faceRay Rivers writes regularly on both federal and provincial politics, applying his more than 25 years as a federal bureaucrat to his thinking.  Rivers was once a candidate for provincial office in Burlington.  He was the founder of the Burlington citizen committee on sustainability at a time when climate warming was a hotly debated subject.   Ray has a post graduate degree in economics that he earned at the University of Ottawa.  Tweet @rayzrivers

Background links:

Pardons for Drug Possession –     Doug Ford and Drugs –    US Smokin’ States

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